About Me and Your Nigerian Uncle

zombie

I am not here to sell you anything.  This isn’t a link to some kind of business venture.  I do not represent your dead uncle in Nigeria, there is no bank account in New York City that requires your signature.  You have not won the lottery nor is there a free iPhone in your future.

The following needs to be added:

  1. I don’t have family in Nigeria so that’s not my uncle. I’m not clicking on your link.
  2. I am not your “dearest friend” and I’m not investing in your company. I’m not clicking on your link.
  3. I do not have a bank account with millions; I think I would remember something like that. I’m not clicking on your link.
  4. No.  The government has not deposited money in my account and no, I am not entering my banking info. I’m not clicking on your link.
  5. I don’t care if Russian women want to meet me.  I’m married. I’m not clicking on your link.
  6. I don’t want a free iphone. I’m not clicking on your link.
  7. I don’t care if you think my penis is too small, I’m not clicking on your link.
  8. I don’t care if you think my boobs are too small, I’m not clicking on your link.
  9. My blogs do not contain “important information that you are loving” and I’m not clicking on your link.
  10. No. I am not interested in your nekkid pictures.  You have nothing that I don’t have..okay, yours are defying gravity more than mine.  I’m not clicking on your link.

If you were poor when you arrived here?  I guarantee you’ll be poor when you leave.

I am a humanist; I believe in the inherent value of all people.  I base my decisions on the individual.  I don’t care about race, I don’t care what fairy godfather/mother governs your religious beliefs, I don’t care if you sport twigs and berries or a womb in your underdrawers.

I am a diehard Boston Bruin fan; I am a gamer, I am a mother, a Baba and a wife.  I am no one’s victim.

 

 

2 responses to “About Me and Your Nigerian Uncle

  1. You have the best ‘About Me’ I’ve read in a long time! I love your sense of humor. Looking forward to keeping up with your blog 🙂

    YAY for Boston sports teams!

  2. michal

    LOL i love this!!

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