To All The Young Women (and men)

The Shrinking Violet syndrome. I had so hoped that this stupidity had been erased, that women had learned that being a serf to a man was akin to being dead. Obviously, I am not referring to different countries where the culture is still locked in the Stone Age with regard to equality of the sexes. I am talking about Western culture. The culture that saw women rise up and take hold of their lives, their future, and their sexuality. A culture that saw women becoming successes in their own right, as human beings, not as pair of boobs, tight ass and on the arm of some dude. Something is going wrong, something is happening. Take a look at the statistics for cosmetic surgery, take a look at the rise in the incidents of anorexia and bulimia. Watch one of those ridiculous music channels and look, really look at the women, how they are being portrayed and how they portray themselves.

You know, life is a gift. Life in a western culture is such a marvelous boon. To be born into a place, a time, a country where we are permitted to speak our minds without fear of beatings, of imprisonment or worse. To be born in a country free of devastating drought, warfare and crippling poverty. We are in Nirvana, we of the Western World. Yet there are those who would see us change this Nirvana, those who would see women subjugated again. The most bizarre thing about this is that often, it is women, themselves who sabotage the delicate balance of equality.

The woman who chooses to be the mistress. The woman who chooses to be the dirty little secret. The woman who chooses to have herself objectified as some sort of male trophy to be paraded out in front of other men. The woman who chooses clothing based on how it will be perceived by men. Cut down to there and up to here – everything on display. I’ve heard that these women love the sense of power it gives them. The power to bring a man to his knees; it is a fleeting power at best, a total misunderstanding of sexuality at its worst. Any woman can bring a man to his knees, any man can bring a woman to her knees but that isn’t power. It holds nothing positive; it is the worst example of false ego there can be, aside from actual abuse.

Go to a mall and do a bit of female watching. The young women dressed for the street and I do mean “for the street” but they aren’t being singled out here, look at the older women. It’s so sad, so pathetic in so many cases. They have fallen for the MILF fantasy. Mimicking the appalling styles sported by the younger, firmer generation. Women, old enough to know better, dressed like prosti-tots. Worse, allowing their own daughters to dress in a like manner.

We can place some of the blame on media, on the fashion industry but only a portion; we have all been gifted with free will, with I.Q’s (most of us, at any rate), we have the ability to choose right from wrong. Choosing to dress and portray oneself as a sexual object is wrong. On so many levels. It impacts on the rest of society. It negates the work, the very hard work, women have done to elevate ourselves from serf to human being. A brief surf of the ‘net will show you how damaging the creation of these plastic images are, in reality. The web sites where teenagers and very young women flaunt their bodies for the world. And the world, and the world, everlasting, because once that pic is uploaded? It is there forever. Moms and Dads will be able to see it, friends and enemies alike can download it, at will. Potential employers will be able to see it.

Objectifying human beings creates an atmosphere where human beings are just that, objects. Things. Belongings. Chattel. The legal rights may remain but legal means shit. You can see that by the number of women abused by their partners. Peace bonds ignored. In fact, in a good many cases? Days, if not hours after an incident of abuse, the woman opens the door to the abuser, again – of her own free will because, after all…he says he’s sorry. Ladies, we do not need a man to define us. To make us whole. We need to be whole in order to find a man – a real man, not a reasonable facsimile. To allow ourselves to be treated as if we are a belonging, as if we are nothing more than a life sized toy is to destroy ourselves, destroy the gift we were given, of free will, of intelligence but most important, the gift of human dignity.

A real man, one who understands what masculinity entails is not afraid of a woman with a mind. A real man knows that awesome sex originates in the brain, for both sexes. Common, everyday sex may originate in the penis but truly awesome sex? Now that needs a working intelligence as a prime ingredient, without the brain, sex is nothing more than a normal biological function, akin to taking a leak. For the earth to move, you need the magic ingredient of an I.Q. – with that ingredient? The earth will move and move and keep on moving every time you think about it and it will only get better, the more equal the partners.

I’ve known women, in my life, who will do, say or behave in any way possible to “get” or “keep” a man. Denying who they are, pretending to not have an opinion or a thought of their own, and putting up with the most abusive, denigrating behaviours, all for the sake of having a man. But, by the same token, what kind of “man” is willing to settle for a plasticized woman? One without a will or drive to succeed. One who does not challenge the mind. One who cannot introduce her partner to something new, to something undiscovered? May as well go out and buy one of those inflatable sex dolls, far less expensive in the long run.

Have we created, through the power of popular media, a generation of plasticized people? A generation without the ability to think for themselves, to create on their own, to live, to love as dimensional human beings? If it all has to come down to the sex – then as an older and wiser human being, let me tell you, without hesitation or doubt, great sex is only possible when both minds are in working order. When both minds are equal, in body, in spirit and in real life outside the bedroom door. Games are fine as long as both parties are aware of that a game is being played, that both parties have the rule book and that both parties know that a game is just a game, that there is an end to it and life must go on afterward.

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